Today I was around a successful people. Not just adults, but kids. Kids that are only 15 years old that have done so much more then me already in life. All in honors, all super smart, involved in sports, active, knowing so much about life and just random things. I just felt so stupid sitting there. Just listening to these young kids talk and looking back at my life so far. All I have done was drink, do drugs, not do any sports or clubs, never volunteered, was disrespectful, rude, got bad grades and I was ignorant. I can go on. I never did anything productive or interesting in my life. I can’t join sports now because at my age everything is competitive. There’s nothing good that I can even join as volunteer work around where I live. I can’t even get a job for Gods sake. I have done anything and high school is usually the prime time for getting involved. It’s suppose to be the best years of my life and I don’t even remember half of it. I was always fucked up. My brain cells are dead. I’m not even smart. I just want to give up. I don’t thin I’ve ever been this upset with my life in so long.. Blah .